Lindsey Nordby

I have only been to Chicago one time before, but I remember leaving feeling absolutely restored. It was as if new life had been breathed into me.

Both times I’ve been in Chicago, I’ve been wrapped up in the theatre scene because that’s who I go to visit. Both friends of mine, Abby and Josiah, are actively involved in the theatre scene in Chicago, as are all of their friends in the city.

Theatre is something I left behind in 2018. At the time, I was taking a temporary break from it. Although, as time went on, COVID happened and then a lot more life happened, and I still haven’t quite found my way back.

Though, as my trip to Chicago Spring of 2018 did for me, this recent trip was also like breathing a breath of new life into me.

My love and passion for theatre was almost reawakened, my heart again yearning to be on the stage.

Last time I came home from Chicago, I started the process of transferring schools to study theatre at a school in downtown Denver. I remember sitting on the phone with my mom in the airport on my way home, telling her all about how much I missed theatre and how I was going to transfer. While this didn’t pan out and I ultimately ended up staying at the school I was at, a similar thing happened when I returned home this time and I began actively seeking out auditions. I haven’t landed anything yet, but I’ve now submitted two auditions and have one more planned in two weeks. This is exciting stuff!

Another thing that this trip to Chicago reminded me of is how much I truly love the city.

As a person who grew up needing to use cars to get around everywhere, the realty of being able to use trains and walking to get around places makes my little heart flutter. Being able to walk down the street to five different shops and restaurants on each corner makes me so excited.

I remember when my cousin and I used to walk from our Grandma’s house up the street to the downtown area of our city and how much I loved just walking around and taking in the world. My dependence on cars grew when I got to college, but I was quickly reminded how much I love the lack of them.

Chicago will always be something special to me because of the spark it gives my little theatre-loving heart and the passion it always seems to bring back into my person.

I truly think there is something really precious about places that ignite something deeper inside of you. In traveling to Chicago, I expected a trip to see my best friend and some others and walked away with so much more.

As I’ve become an adult, I’ve struggled with a lot of growing pains. Mental health, belonging, purpose, just to name a few. It’s almost as if opportunities arise right when they need to, because as I was feeling particularly down, being in Chicago checked all of those boxes for me and helped remind me of who I am, deep down.

I’ll never forget this place, and I’ll never stop longing to be back again.

There are so many things that Chicago has given me that I hold dear and true.

As I’ve been spending time thinking back on this trip, I’ve learned a couple things about my struggles.

First and foremost, mental health is only a roadblock if you let it be. I’ve spent so many years worried about separation anxiety and general anxiety, and this has caused me to build a wall between me and the things I want to seek out as an individual. Once I decided to tear down that wall, I learned that while there are still points of growth needed, I was wholly responsible for the wall that was there. That once I decided to overcome it, the grass truly was greener on the other side. While mental health is not always a decision, if you find yourself struggling with something, ask yourself if you are causing the hardship on yourself and if there is a simple answer to overcome it. For me, there was.

Second, I learned that what I walked away from in 2018 is the one thing I should have never left behind. While this was partially coupled with my separation anxiety, I learned that my heart yearns for the thing I decided to step away from. This spoke to my source of belonging and purpose. I was built to be in the theatre. I was built to be telling stories and sharing music and making art. Those are my people and that is my place. That’s where I am meant to be.

Third, I learned that the world is only as small as I let it be. I always feel so confined by my little neck of the woods, convinced that there’s nothing here for me. But I was reminded of how much there is out there, and how there are plenty of opportunities everywhere if you just look for them.

All in all, I couldn’t be happier with my decision to take this trip to Chicago. It reawakened something in me. It made me come alive.